I can hardly believe that almost a year has passed since then. But alas, it has!
I have been a Moaning Myrtle lately
but I feel that now it is o.k. to do some moaning! I mean come on - we have been waiting for our family for a while now! I used to try and put on a happy face when people asked about our adoption! Now, I tell them how I am feeling - sad, frustrated, disillusioned, angsty(yes, I said angsty - is that even a word)! And you know what, people have been really good about it for the most part! Being a Moaning Myrtle doesn't mean I am always sad - I am happy - happy to have my health, Yvan, my animals, my family and friends. I am happy every day I wake up because really, just the fact that I have woken up is a good thing!
But the sadness is always there, simmering underneath! We are once again watching our neighbourhood wake-up from the long winter - families out for walks again...babies are EVERYWHERE I tell you! EVERYWHERE!
Two couples we know are having their second baby since we started our adoption...That. My friends... is a bitter-sweet pill to swallow! We are happy for them but sad for ourselves. They will have gotten pregnant AND given birth again before we are even home with our wee one.
And so I moan! My Maternal Clock is going "tick, tock, tick, tock" well it is really more of a Gong! I am surprised you haven't heard it! It does make sleeping a bit of a challenge lately what with all the GONG! GONG! GONG! ringing thru my ears. I tried ear plugs - it doesn't work!
There is one thing that helps drown out the noise of the clock - running - but I broke up with running last July because of injuries but since spring has come to town (my letter to Winter worked by the way) I see it everywhere. So, I am going to start again and in the next 7 weeks I will train to run 10K like I did here last year. Yikes! Only 7 weeks! I hope the thump, thump, thump of the my feet hitting the pavement will keep out the Gonging...but if it doesn't, then I will just crank up the ipod a little louder!
So, I hope you will excuse my moaning for the next little while - I will probably moan about our wait some more and I will DEFINITELY moan about my 10K training! Did I mention I only have 7 weeks to get ready! Oh boy!
P.S. There are actually two things that drown out the GONG - Twilight is the other and I have started reading the series again - mock me if you must but it really works!
23 comments:
You have every right to moan Rana. I hope Twilight helps!!! I watched the movie with Salaash on the weekend and he loved it. He kept saying"when are they going to kiss??" It was awesome! I also am going to start reading them again. Atleast we will have happy husbands. LOL!!!
Natasha
Moan away Myrtle (I mean Rana)!
Still love you even if your moopy and moany...enjoy your running, it should give you a good stress release!
So that is the strange noise I heard! Gong! :)
Moan as much as you want. To be honest, I would think something was wrong with ya if you weren't moaning! I still check in every day, I am thinking of you and Yvan.
I log in every morning hoping that this will be the day for you. I read the entire twilight series last weekend and it was such a great escape from this crazy adoption stuff. For the first time in a year, I felt truly distracted. I was so sad when I got to the last page of the last book----darn it, doesn't this author know how much I need another story to escape into? LOL. Sending positive thoughts your way!.
Kirsten
Kirsten! Have you read "The Host" yet? It is also by Stepanie Myers and is really good! It will get you hooked too - however, there is only one book so far! I hope she does a follow up.
UGH. Yes, moan away!!! You are surrounded by friends who understand! I remember being shocked by the number of non-adoption people who were no put off when I've been honest about waiting-feelings.
I've watch the "multiple pregnancies" since we started too. It is SO FREAKING HARD.
You are doing remarkable well. If I had waited this long I would be a puddle. And 10k?! You go Mama.
Moan all you want to! You are definitely aloud, but for the love of pete, CAFAC, silence Rana's gong already!
Kristin
Moan all you need, Mona, I mean Rana.
Funnily enough, I also start running again soon. I'm only doing a 5K to start. I think running will do us both a world of good.
That's right... moan away! :) And you don't moan as much as other people I know who are pregnant!!! sheesh
I have yet to finish the twilight series but absolutely LOVED the first two books. I'm quite anxious to watch the movie as well! But I know for myself I'm back to the "can't think about adoption" stage... must distract myself.
It looks like the verdict is out. MOAN AWAY!
It does not bother me one bit and it appears as though no-one else posting here is bothered either.
Turn up the volume and run, run, run!
I'm moaning with you,Rana! And there's no running in it for me. But I do need a distraction. I too have family now growing baby #2 while we wait...(and I grow but no baby...!).
Oh I hope you get better news next week then we got this week.
RaMOANa
If you add moan to your name we're twins!
You can only moan if I can moan with you- this sucks! Good for you with the running- the only place I am running is to the fridge!
Carolyn
Ha ha Carolyn! You always make me laugh - the running to the fridge is why I need to run outside Hello Bum where did you come from?"
I hear you Rana - if I continue replaying Muse singing " You could be my unintended....." my kids are going to turn think Mommy is seriously obsessed...
Do your 10 K and then come to Brandon for a visit and some weekend physio with the best in town.. :) Chet will fix you up in no time...
Sher
Oh Sherri! We could watch Twilight too ;)
Moan all you want, lady. You have good reason.
BUT... watch your mail, I am going to try to send a little something out to help brighten your mood a little (if the weather permits me the LOOOONG walk to the post office next week!)
well if i can moan about absolutely nothing then, yes, as everyone else said... mona-way! lol
this is an awesome place to do it look at all the people here to commiserate with and offer help and support. they are awesome people and you are so lucky.
so far just starting the first Twilight book. i like it so far. i loved the movie! (which i only saw 4 times in the theatre and who knows how many times since)
they are filming it here and i keep hoping to run into a certain hot doctor! eep!
i come home for a visit in august and i hope to see you then even if for a short visit.
hugs & misses!
Rach
ps - doing my Naked Voodoo Dance for you! (don't knock it, it got me to meet Duran Duran! lol)
Moan as much as you need to, i'll be here to listen. I think we are due for another phone chat soon, maybe next week sometime?!
That gong was YOU? Thank doG, I thought my washing machine was dying. :-)
I'm glad you have some things to make it a bit more bearable. Even if I cannot fathom nor understand the love of running (I don't run unless a homicidal maniac is chasing me) but I admire you for doing so!
moan away...you certainly have earned the right.
I love that word, "angsty." I think you pinned it perfectly. I feel for you. I too check in on your blog and always hope that there will be some good news. I feel your pain.
Happy training! I've just hit the pavement myself. I don't like to run in the winter so I'm only just back at it too... Unfortunately we got snow in Ottawa today. Ugh!!
read your post from last year - on my bday no less- and now the next bday approaches. my heart breaks for you. hang in there, sk
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