Working From Home

I started working from home in July.

I really liked it at first but I think it might have had to do with it being summer.

Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy not having to get up and get myself to an office at a specific time.

Now I can roll out of bed at 8:15 in the a.m. go downstairs, make a tea, grab a bite to eat and head down to my office in the basement by 8:25.

I like that a lot!

Many times I'm still in my pajamas - hee!

Fall has set in and it is darker in the morning and gloomier in the day what with clouds rolling in leaking precipitation which will eventually lead to snow and I find myself feeling lonely.

I'm a social person...I like to have people to talk to and now I find I talk to myself a lot, and the cats and dogs too.

We set up a really nice office for me in the basement. It is cheery and bright and I have surrounded myself with my books (which I love) but there are times I just like to be upstairs where I can peer out the window of our dining room and see the world going by.

For instance, I just saw our retired neighbours come home from the grocery store!

So, today, it is particularly gloomy out as it can be the last week of October with Halloween looming and so I sit at the kitchen table gazing out the window trying to focus on work.

Confession Friday

Following in the footsteps of Tova, Cinnamon and Keltie, I have decided to join in on "Confession Fridays" because I like it!

1. I confess I have been lacking motivation to blog lately mainly because it would be a lot of me boo hooing about how I am feeling and really who needs that?

2. I confess I made a batch of whole wheat chocolate chip cookies this morning for my homemade pizza date night tonight with Yvan and I have already eaten 3 cookies.

3. I confess I am writing this post while propped up in bed with my dogs and cats cuddled up to me and watching another episode of House Hunters and it is 11:38 a.m.

4. I confess this week has been a long, hard, boring week.

5. I confess I have been wearing one particular pair of super, duper, comfy sweat pants I recently bought a lot! I mean a lot...like almost every day...no, o.k. every day...and I might have even worn them to the grocery store (I do not wear sweat pants out in to the world) once or twice.

6. I confess to eating McDonald's this week and enjoying it while eating it only to get intense gut rot immediately after taking my last bite and wishing I hadn't crumbled to the call of the Golden Arches and how my body tried its best to get the aforementioned food out and Yvan was the one who was punished by the warfare ensued by my intestinal tract...hee hee! Sorry honey!

7. I confess to overindulging on Amazon this week on some books solely for my personal reading pleasure...I can't wait to read "My Booky Wook" by Russell Brand.

8. I confess I am super excited for this Tuesday because it is Glee Tuesday and this coming week they are doing "The Rocky Horror Glee Show" and I am all about Rocky Horror!!!!

9. I confess to not being good at phone calls anymore. I used to be a good friend who called people every week...hmmmmmm...not so much anymore. Sorry to all my friends!

10. I confess to not being the best wife this week to my husband and appreciate more than he knows the fact he deals with my "exorcist-like" behaviour very well :)

If I Were Being Honest.....

I would have to tell you this:

I AM GOING CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BONKERS!!!!!

CERTIFIABLY INSANE!!!!

I feel like Steve Martin in "The Jerk"...you know the scene where his wife leaves him and he says:

"I don't need you, all I need is this lamp! This lamp and this chair..." and goes on and on and is eventually wandering down the street with all the things he doesn't need except for...

It is taking all my will power not to run up and down the street yelling "WHEN WILL OUR VISA COME?!" with random articles of furniture from our house as being all I need...but really all I need is OUR SON HOME!!!!

I have been trying to play it cool....trying to be the brave gal who can face anything and take anything...but I feel the facade crumbling....I don't feel cool at all...I feel like a

NUTTY NUTTERTON!!!

I have been searching the Internets again for answers....just like when we were waiting for our referral...which by the way was almost 15 months ago...I try not to linger on that most days because it would drive me to drink if I did but sometimes it pops into my head especially around the holidays (Happy Thanksgiving all!).

But alas, the answers aren't there...they are far away in Nairobi...sitting on a desk of some stranger who has the power in their hands to determine "yes, you will be a family" (I won't think about any other options) and waiting for said stranger to stamp our son's passport with the little, tiny stamp we need to bring him home is making me

LOOPY!!!!!!

Please let the visa come soon....please!

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

The Vomit Factor

I am a walking time bomb of vomit right now.

So gross, ya, I know...but true.

My anxiety level has reached an all time high whereas I feel like I could spew at any and every moment of the day.

I wake up feeling nauseous and I go to bed feeling the same way.

We have been slowly working on the room.

The slowness with which we are getting the room ready....makes me want to vomit!

I would prefer to have the room ready by now. However, this is not the case and I have to deal with it. Slow is better than not at all. (Newsflash! We will be doing a weekend room blitz because I have declared it so!)

Washing of all clothes for the wee one has begun. Now, how this wee little dude ended up with 15 sleepers all size 18-24 months is beyond me. 15!!!! That is not counting the onesies we have (which I refuse to count because I am not sure he will even need to wear onesies at all.)

And so, our little dude will be wearing a lot of sleepers just so I can justify the fact I purchased so many. (I am sure this will be the basis of many future therapy sessions when he is an adult) When did I purchase 15 sleepers anyways???? Oh ya, it was the times I was at Costco and my cart would go into autopilot and guide itself over to the kids clothes. I rue the day you came into existence Costco for more than one reason but mainly because you make the cutest sleepers for $7.98 plus tax. And yes, I know I shouldn't buy these sleepers mass produced in another country, most likely by child labour but they are SO CUTE!!! The fact I have fallen into the oh-so-cleverly laid trap of this behemoth makes me feel queasy.

I digress...

While washing all the clothes and going through what we have, I get anxious again. Do we have enough socks? What about t-shirts?? Pants??? Sweaters????? It gets cold where we live. Very cold!

What about shoes? I haven't been able to buy shoes yet because we aren't sure what size his feet are! Will he be shoeless and taunted by all the other children because his parents weren't capable enough to determine shoe size!?????

Oy vey...I need to lay down before I toss my cookies from the worry of "Will we be able to handle properly clothing our child?"

In August, my momma was in town for a visit, so I enlisted her as well as my mom and sis-in-law to help me shop for the necessities of raising a toddler. So I set about creating a list of what we would need to have with us for our trip to Ethiopia and once we were back at home

46.

The number of items on my list for "toiletries" for wee one.

46 Items!!!!!!

This number is brought to me by family, friends and fellow adoptive parents who have BTDT and passed on their lists to me.

46.

We need a suitcase just for the toiletries...seriously?

Then there is the question of what to pack for clothes for him, toys to keep to him occupied, food for the trip home so he doesn't think we are inept at feeding him as well.

This all leads into - How will the first meeting go? Will he even want to come to us? What will be thinking as we whisk him away from all he knows? For certain he will be thinking "Who are these people who clearly have no experience at parenting?"

I need some of the Baby Gravol I purchased to keep the waves of nausea in my stomach at bay.

O.k. so getting ready for our little dude clearly has a huge vomit factor.

But so does the wondering! The waiting.

Has our medical left yet? How long until it gets to Nairobi? Will it get lost along the way?

When will someone look at it? How much time will take them to review it? Will it be weeks or months until the Visa is issued?

Insert commercial for Rescue Remedy here because without it I would not be able to stay sane.

Normally, when dealing with a stressful situation, I would try to empty the entire contents of the fridge and pantry into my mouth at once...but the thought of our most delicious homemade pizza or my favourite dessert (Schmoo) totally makes me want to gag as in "Like, Oh MY GAWD, gag me with a spoon".

The vomit factor.

On a scale of 1 - 10...

...I am running at an 11!

Hooray Carolyn and Adam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally!!!

After the longest wait ever!!!!

Carolyn and Adam are going to Ethiopia to bring home their son!!!!!

Carolyn and I have become very good friends through our crazy adoption journeys...and quite frankly I would be a babbling mess wondering around the streets and yelling "F#$K" out loud in middle of the grocery store (he he right Tova) if it wasn't for her.

We are so happy for them!!!!

They are days away from being united as a family of 3 and we are overjoyed!!!

Safe travels friends!

Much love to you all!