Thursday, December 31, 2009

On the Eve of A New Year

2010

Can you believe it?

Midnight tonight will usher in the year 2010.

I remember when I was a kid not even being able to fathom the idea of the year 2000 and how old being 28 seemed to me let alone 2010 and 38...

Yvan has been fond of reminding me lately how none of us are supposed to be here right now and we have been living the last 10 years on borrowed time...of course you have to really, truly know him to know he is being facetious and doesn't really think life as we know it should have ended at midnight in 2000...but now his new schtick is that 2012 is the year we should all be worried about..sigh!

I don't think I have ever had such a tumultuous year as this past one. There were times I wasn't sure I could make it one more day without knowing who our wee one was. Each day seemed to take a month and each month seemed like a year had passed.

As much as time seemed to be like molasses pouring out of a container, taking its sweet ever-lovin' time, it also seemed like time was slipping thru my fingers...you know "like sand through the hour glass" and all. It seemed like I was plunging head first in to my middle age years (don't laugh or pooh, pooh me it is truly how I felt) and hadn't become a parent yet which was "inconceivable".

We decided to fill the time and declared it the "Year of Us"and were going to go on exciting adventures before it wasn't as easy to get up and go.

Off we headed down the yellow brick road of our life which took us to...

The beach where we relaxed and sipped cold drinks while sunning our selves.

Shortly after that we headed to the land of movie stars and paparazzi - L.A. where we had the distinct pleasure of staying with two of the nicest people we have ever met who were waiting for their kids just as we were (now they are a lovely, beautiful family of 4)

Then THE DAY came when everything changed for us.

We became a family!!!

We had baby, a boy, our Ade.

It was the the best day I had ever experienced aside from the day I married Yvan.

In case you don't remember it went like this.

"Inconceivably" we had become parents.

We enjoyed the "referral high" for quite a while and took our final big excursion in the "Year of Us" and headed to a destination which become for both of us Love at First Taxi Ride!!

When we arrived home we hoped the news of a court date would quickly arrive proceeded shortly by the hugely anticipated travel date...

...but sometimes, the road of life is full of unexpected twists and turns. While we both thought these twists and turns were behind us now that we knew we who our wee baby boy was it seemed it was not to be...we are going to experience the rollercoaster ride for a bit longer.

The "Year of Us" has been made possible because of all the love and support we have gotten from family and friends - both non-adoption and adoption alike.

Our families - we have both been blessed with the best families a couple for ask - my mom and auntie, Yvan's parents, sister and brother - have really allowed us to feel what we were feeling, talk when we needed too...not talk when we couldn't...cry, scream, laugh maniacally, and whatever other emotions we found ourselves experiencing. Thru it all they have believed for us when we couldn't. When we are guarding our hearts they hope for us with all of theirs that our dreams will come true. We couldn't be more thankful for their unwavering support...even we snark at them ;)

Our friends - we are lucky to have some truly, great friends in our life...friends we had before we started this crazy journey to family who have stood by us and while maybe don't exactly know what we are going thru let us know they are still there when need them. They allow us our moments of selfishness and kick us in the butts to think about other things too! Thank you for years of friendship - it means more than you know mainly because we don't tell you enough.

Our adoption community - never have I met a group of people so phenomenal in my life. You allow us to pour out our feelings. You seem to like us, really like us! You never judge, just offer unending support, even when I am a broken record of boo hooingness...no one understands like those who are experiencing what you are...there may be varied degrees but at the end of the day you know what it is like to want a family so badly and for it to take so long you think you might just not make it. You have held us up when we couldn't walk...you have opened up and shared your stories with us so we know we are not alone...because if we were alone in this...oh boy..it wouldn't be pretty!! Thank you, thank you, thank you.

On the eve of a New Year, we reflect over the past year...we are beyond grateful for all life has given us..loving families, supportive friends, the means to travel, our health, and the ability to communicate and connect with others.

We are thankful for the love we have for a wee boy who WILL, one day, in the year 2010, be ours.

Happy New Year!!!!

16 comments:

Brendan and Mary said...

That post made me feel a little emotional, Rana. I'm glad you took for a year for "us" because next year will be the year of your sweet Ade!

Happy New Year! See you in 2010 (that sure does age ya, doesn't it?!)

Carolyn said...

Happy New Year guys! Hope that 2010 is the best ever as you meet your baby boy for the first time! I hope the bumps of the roller coaster are behind you.

Carolyn

tobink said...

A lovely New Year's Eve post. I love how you always seem to be able to look at life with gratitude, even through the unexpected twists and turns. Can't wait, in 2010, to read all about your exciting adventures in Ethiopia, and your exciting adventures in parenting!

Happy New Year!

Karen

tobink said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
tobink said...

Sorry, my first message posted twice, so I deleted the second copy. Just didn't want you to think I posted something awful and then retracted. :) And now you have three posts from me. Sorry everyone.

Dianne said...

Happy New Year, Rana and Yvan!

We were talking with some friends last night, and agreed that after a challenging 2009, 2010 promises to bring a lot of joy, peace and goodness. I'm dreaming big, bright dreams for you for the coming year.

Kristen and Dave said...

Happy New Year to you both - what a great post, honest and uplifting! I can't wait to hear more news.

CinnamonOpus said...

What a lovely look back on what was truly an up-and-down year. I hope this is the last day of the up-and-down ride for you, and tomorrow ushers in a new year that is just up, up, up!

Happy New Year!

Julie said...

Happy New Year Rana. Your great attitude continues to uplift and inspire. Love to you guys.

hazel said...

As Cinn said: UP UP and UP. That is your 2010. I KNOW IT.

Thanks again for sticking with me every step of the way. And for hearing me out with my current grief, even when you're dealing with your own.

Much love to you both.

BCMommy said...

Happy New Year to you!
May 2010 bring good news to all of us, and see many children and parents united forever!
Claire

Jackie said...

Thank you for sharing your story. Bring on 2010! Can't wait for the "Year of Ade"!

Jackie

june said...

Wow, that was a lot crammed into one year! Happy New Year, and I have high hopes for you for 2010. :)

(EARLY 2010! C'mon court...)

andrea said...

This is an amazing post... thank you so much for sharing. I'm actually crying because you have put so many of our own emotions so eloquently down in print. We too spent last night talking about the good, the bad and the ugly from 2009 (and the whol decade actually) and also came up on the positive side given all our blessings (even in the face of the challenges). Plus, now its 2010... and it has got to be THE year! Happy 2010 to you... A

emily and mike said...

This year is going to be amazing!!! Can't wait to see pictures of Ade running around your home : )

And who knows, maybe we'll have a playdate in 2010?!?!

darci said...

happy new year!! this is the year you will hold your sweet son-i am waiting to read the news and scream! :)